February 2013 Recap

In February, we pretty much took pictures of this little cutie all month:

 Valentine's Day, 2 weeks old

 My parents came for a visit, and we to Scheels to ride the Ferris wheel.

Caleb tried to be a good sport, 

but he got tired of waiting. 

 Finally riding it! Caleb with Grandpa and Scott with Brandon. 

Katelyn came, too, but she took a nap the whole time. :)

Scott loved all the displays and had a great time!

And Katelyn was cute. That's what we did in February. 

Oh, and bought a minivan--that was awesome, too. 

Katelyn Brielle Barrus - A Birth Story

Katelyn Brielle is here!
Born 1 February 2013, 7:43 AM
at 38 weeks, 0 days gestation
9 lbs. 4 oz.  20.5 inches

(Here's Scott's birth story, and here's Caleb's, for comparison) 

The last week of January, I was sort of wrapping things up. I performed in the closing show of "Florencia en el Amazonas" on Sunday, Monday and Tuesday were my last days of teaching voice lessons at home, and then I had a few other projects I wanted to finish up before I was 38 weeks along and the baby could come at any time. I had a feeling she would come on Feb 2 or 4, because both boys were born at 38 weeks 3 days, and I just had feelings about those days. At my Mother Blessing, which was held a couple weeks before, my friend Dana said that Feb 1 sounded like a great day to have a baby--her daughter was born on that day one year ago. 

Last day of "Florencia en el Amazonas". So ready to be done. 

On Wednesday and Thursday of that week, I just felt like lounging all day. I knew there were things I could be getting done that would  make life with a newborn easier, but I just couldn't bring myself to do them. I think my body was conserving energy. My emotional state was also interesting to me--I felt so done being pregnant, but I was really trying to temper those feelings, because I could conceivably be pregnant for another 4 weeks. (That thought made me want to bawl, by the way).

Raeann Peck, my angelic midwife, came over for a prenatal appointment on Wednesday, Jan. 30 and I cried through it. I think it was difficult for me to deal with feeling deep in my heart that the baby would be here soon, but knowing that I may need to be patient (and large and uncomfortable, etc) for another few days to weeks. Looking back, it was the same way I felt during the few days before I had Caleb. 

At the end of our appointment, she told me she wouldn't be surprised if I had the baby within a week. I had checked myself a few days back, and I wasn't dilated or effaced. This was just her feeling. In fact, I knew she really did feel that way, she wasn't just saying that, because we both forgot to schedule the next weekly prenatal appointment--I had to call her back and put it on the books. And Raeann was right--we didn't end up needing that prenatal. :) 

On the night of Thursday, Jan. 31, I was 37 weeks 6 days pregnant. Seth (Brandon's brother) was opening his mission call. He didn't get out of class until late that night and wouldn't be able to come up to West Jordan until 8:30pm (past my boys' bedtime as it is), and David and Sharon (Brandon's parents) were at a dinner that went longer than they expected. I knew it would be a stressful night (trying to put our boys down for bed is difficult at other places, and there were so many excited and loud people there, it was not happening), but I wasn't expecting that I would have such strong Braxton Hicks contractions on top of everything. So here I am, just wanting to stay at home and cry because I'm still pregnant and I'm trying to be patient, having pretty strong practice contractions, and trying to be happy and social around all these people (and not really succeeding--I was pretty grumpy, sorry everyone :). 

At Seth's mission call opening. He was called to the Indonesia Jakarta Mission, by the way. 

In fact, at one point Eric (over Skype) asked me something about why I was in a bad mood, and I told him I was "in the zone, having contractions" and he asked if we were having a baby soon. Just to be snarky, I said "yes, we're having a baby tomorrow". As soon as I said that, though, I kind of knew it was true. I started to know things were getting serious, although my contractions were not following a pattern--I would have 3 or 4 in a row, every 7 minutes, and then I'd go for an hour and only have one or two, etc. When Sharon (my mother-in-law, a L&D nurse for many years) saw me after they got home from the dinner, she immediately said "Are you in labor?" to which I started crying and said "I don't know!" She said "that sounds familiar", because that's exactly the way I felt the night before I went into active labor with Caleb. 

Well, Seth opened his mission call and will be serving in the Jakarta, Indonesia mission this May. We are so excited and happy for him! It was about 10:30 pm before we finally got home, and the boys got to sleep about 11pm. I remember when Brandon and I were finally in bed for the night, he asked me if I was still having contractions and he needed to time them (they had slowed down by that point) and made me promise that I would wake him up as soon as I thought they were the real thing.(I made the mistake of telling him about this 5-minute birth story a couple weeks before). Just in case, I had him pick up our bedroom a little, make sure the boys' suitcases were packed with clothes and diapers, and bring up my birth ball from the basement. I told him maybe we would have a baby the next day. I decided that, even if I am not really in labor, I'm going to wear my new comfy nightgown that I bought especially for labor. I deserve it, I tell myself. Then I went to sleep, and slept the night. 

Feb. 1, 2013     5:15 AM       38 weeks 0 days pregnant
I am awakened by a contraction. This one is the real deal--bottom pressure, makes me need to concentrate and breathe through it to keep the rest of my body relaxed. I decide to time contractions for a bit before waking Brandon. A little before 6 AM, the contractions are more than a minute long and at least every 5 minutes in frequency, so I wake Brandon and ask him to call Raeann and text everyone who was at my Mother Blessing that I am in labor and ask them to light their candles. I also put on my Mother Blessing necklace, an action which is really helpful for me in admitting to myself that this was it, Delivery Day.  Brandon sends out the texts and emails in to work to let his boss know he won't be there, and switches the sheets on our bed for some water-proof coverings. He also made me some scrambled eggs. 

Raeann and Chyrelle, her birth assistant, arrive a little after 6AM. Interestingly, Raeann said that after her shift at the Jordan River Temple on Thursday night, she was overcome with sleep and went to bed earlier than she would normally have. She thought to herself "A baby is coming sometime tonight or tomorrow". :) Chyrelle said her body woke her up an hour earlier than she normally would, as well. 

I was really hoping the boys would sleep late that morning because they were up so late the night before, but no, at 6:30 Scott wanders into my room while I'm laboring on hands and knees with my birth ball and says "Hi Mom! Hey, Grandma!!!!" He mistook Raeann for my mom, "The faraway Grandma". But he and Caleb were definitely awake, so Brandon took them downstairs to feed them breakfast and called Sharon to see if she could come get them. She said she had woken up at 5 that morning, too, and was just laying in bed thinking of Seth and of us and of her dad, who had recently passed, but who she feels has been very busy on the other side. She picked up our boys on her way from dropping off carpool at the charter school her boys attend. After that, things were much quieter and nice for this laboring mama. :) 

I labored on hands and knees, hanging over my birth ball for a little over an hour. I would go back and forth from the bathroom as well, making sure my bladder stayed empty (I drank a lot of water and Powerade during labor). There was one particular contraction where I could actually feel my cervix just thin and lengthen and the baby's head slide down and engage. It was intense, and I really think with that one contraction I probably gained between 5 and 7 centimeters of dilation. Anyway, it was amazing to feel my body doing that work, and to just do my best to surrender to the amazing and fast changes that were taking place. 

During these next few hours, Brandon was so great at being right next to me (after the boys were taken care of) and saying encouraging things in my ear. He is getting this down! Last time, with Caleb, I had to tell him what I needed him to say, but this time he was way on top of it. He remembered exactly the right spot I needed counterpressure on my back and everything. I love that man. He is wonderful, and I really needed his strength and presence during this birth. 

After a couple of hours of active labor, at about 7:15 am, my legs start to be tired and I felt like I wanted to lay on my side in bed for awhile to rest them. I remember as I waited for a contraction to be over before I climbed up on my bed, I thought to myself  "Why the *$%# did I think this was a good idea?!?" ("this" meaning "have another baby", "have her at home where there's no drugs to make this all go away" "have a vaginal birth at all, why didn't I just opt to be cut open, this really really sucks right about now"). And at the same time, a more rational part of my mind said "Awww, isn't that nice? You're in transition! You can do this! Your baby will be out of you soon, you just have to get through the pushing part." My multiple personalities make me laugh. :)

So I laid on my right side and had a few contractions on the bed that way. Then I said feebly to Raeann "I'm feeling pushy, but I'm afraid and I just want my water to break because I know I'll feel better after it does". I said this because, with Caleb and Scott, I felt less pressure and more ready to push after their waters broke. I was also feeling hesitant to push, because I knew how much it was going to hurt. I just had a sense that this baby was a big one, and I just didn't feel emotionally ready to push her out and go through all that pain yet. . Raeann said if I wanted her to, she would check me to see if I was fully dilated, but she kind of laughingly said that she was pretty sure I could push whenever I wanted. I think she knew I had been physically ready to push for awhile :). I said I did want her to check, and I felt her fingers touching the bulgy water bag. She said I was ready to go whenever I wanted. So I just talked myself into it for a minute. 

I just laid on that bed and gave myself permission, out loud, to birth that baby. I said "It's time for her to be born now. It's time to push her out. You can do this. Your body was made to do this." and lots of other empowering statements like that until I felt ready to get in position and push. I felt like I wanted to be on my hands and knees, supported by my birth ball, up on my bed to give birth, so my birth attendants made that position happen for me. I felt more aggressive, less passive, in that position.

At about 7:35, I pushed once or twice with a contraction, and expressed the wish again that my water would break, and Raeann said she would help me with that if I wanted, but I said I'd wait one more contraction and see what happened. With that contraction, my water broke and Katelyn's head crowned. INTENSE is the only word I can use to describe what it feels like to have a baby crowning. 

Well, she sat there for a moment while I tried to slow things down with my breath and give my body time to stretch and open, and then with the next contraction her head was born, and another contraction came right away (probably a double peaked contraction, now that I think about it) and I pushed right away and got those shoulders out, and she was born! It was 7:43 am, a 2.5 hour labor. She had one loop of loose nuchal cord, and lungs were a little wet, but she pinked right up and was breathing well within a few minutes. 

Then comes the best part ever, getting to hold that sweet baby with Brandon by my side, making sure it's really a girl, and just looking into that sweet, brand-new little face--touching those little feet that have kicked and pushed inside me for so many months, putting a face with the little personality we've gotten to know for the last few weeks while she was still inside. Nothing like it. 

I liked birthing in more of an upright position this time, because it gave me a minute after she was born to just catch my breath and own my body again without having the baby right there on me. It reminded me of this article. That little moment was very refreshing to me, and then I was able to turn around and lay upright in bed and love on my baby. 

Raeann in the middle, Chyrelle on the right

I was right, she was 9 and a quarter pounds, and I tore a little. I needed 5 or 6 stitches--this is my first time having stitches after birth, and I am totally a wimp about them! ugh. But Katelyn is such a great nurser (with a very strong suck--I've been more sore than with my boys, for sure), she was back to birth weight at 4 days old! And boy, those after-pains are nothing to mess around with after baby #3, yikes! She is also such a great sleeper, she sleeps through anything her brothers dish out--thank goodness!  She seems to have reflux like Scott, but I've had her adjusted at the pediatric chiropractor and she seems to be doing better after that. We have one more appointment next week to see how the adjustment stuck. 

It's been so wonderful to look back and see how a loving Father in Heaven prepared all the people we would need help from that day to be available for Katelyn's birth. She has fit right into to our family, and the boys love her so much. It's also been wonderful to have my parents down for almost a week and we are really thankful for all the meals from the ward and help from my in-laws watching the boys those first few days after Katelyn arrived. Thank you all, we love you!